Senin, 30 April 2007

The Lion

Q. How to catch a lion

Following are the new methods generated after intensive research. Some are useful some very useful.

Newton's Method:
Let, the lion catch you. For every action there is equal and opposite reaction. Implies you caught lion

Einstein Method:
Run in the direction opposite to that of the lion.Due to higher relative velocity,the lion will also run faster and will get tired soon. Now you can trap it easily.

Schrodinger Method:
At any given moment, there is a positive probability that lion to be in the cage. So set the trap, sit down and wait.

Inverse Transformation Method:
We place a spherical cage in the forest and enter it. Perform an inverse transformation with respect to lion. Lion is in and we are out.

Thermodynamic Procedure:
We construct a semi-permeable membrane which allows everything to pass it except lions. Then sweep the entire forest with it.

Integration Differential Method:
Integrate the forest over the entire area. The lion is some where in the result. So differentiate the result PARTIALLY w.r.t lion to trace out the lion

Software Engineer Method:
Catch a cat and claim that your testing has proven that its a Lion. If anyone comes back with issues tell that you will upgrade it to Lion.

Indian Police Method:
Catch any animal and interrogate it to accept that its a Lion.

Frustrated !! Yes/No ??

O.K. Now let’s kill the lion...

Rajnikanth Method:
Keep warning the lion that u may come and attack anytime. The lion will live in fear and die soon in fear itself.

Ramarajan Method:
Remove the make-up and put it over lion. The lion will die notwithstanding that heavy weight.

Jayalalitha Method:
Send Police commissioner Muthukaruppan around 2AM and kill it, while it's sleeping!

Manirathnam Method (director):
Make sure the lion does not get sun light and put the lion in a dark room with a single candle lighted. Keep murmuring something in its ears. The lion will be highly irritated and commit suicide.

Karan Johar Method (director):
Send a lioness into the forest. Our lion and lioness fall in love with each other. Send another lioness in to t he forest, followed by another lion. First lion loves the first lioness and the second lion loves the 2nd lioness. But 2nd lioness loves both lions. Now send another
lioness (third) into the forest. You don't understand right... ok....read it after 15 yrs, then also u wont!

Yash Chopra method (director):
Take the lion to Australia or US... and kill it in a good scenic location.

Govinda method:
Continuously dance before the lion for 5 or 6 days.

Rahul Dravid method:
Ask the lion to bowl at u.U bat for 200 balls and score 1 run.

Maneka Gandhi method:
Save the lion from a danger and feed him with some vegetables continuously.

George Bush method:
Link the lion with OSAMA BIN LADEN and shoot him

Minggu, 01 April 2007

Google Latest Techonlogies

Google has come up with some of what u say very intresting and unbelievable solutions as always. Hats off to Google. Have a look at what i am Blogging about.

Google TiSP (BETA)
Looking for a hi-fi wi-fi connection then here it is. It has a long way to reach other countries specially like India. This service is for Developed countries. But i know you would like to have a peek around. Google TiSP (BETA) is a fully functional, end-to-end system that provides in-home wireless access. Google says "Want Wi-fi around? Just flush it down". Google offers professional and enterprise editions too.

Google Romance
All out there searching for your destined one. Stop searching at wrong places and turn to Google.
As always google has come up with a intresting solution for all. Soulmate Searchis the technology that i am talking about. So stop fooling yourself and turn to google for a chance to fool around ;). In words of google "When you think about it, love is just another search problem. And we’ve thought about it. A lot. Google Romanceis our solution."

Google Gulp (BETA)™ with Auto-Drink™ (LIMITED RELEASE)
A revolutionary new drink which gives you the cutting edge technology that google uses to organise information it's search engine comes across to. This same technology can be used by you all u have to do is Gulp the Google Gulp. Google Gulp is designed to maximize your surfing efficiency by making you more intelligent, and less thirsty.


Google Technology
what is Google Technology of ranking pages that makes you love the search results. Have a quick overview of the technology and increase the level of trust u show in Google Search. The people at Google call it PigeonRank™.

Google's MentalPlexTM
This cool tool understands what u are looking for and searches that. All u have to do is look at the rotating disc. Google mentalplex helps u find what u are looking for very efficiently.

Google Job Opportunities
Google has already created a big spot for itself in the history of this planet. Do u think u lost the chance of being in it. Do not look sad Google will give u chance to create history on Moon.
All u have to do is Apply for the Job.

This April Fool i made a fool of some of my friends, so did Google. In its attempt to make a fool of its users this year they had a new idea.